seattle we love you.

dear Chattanooga,

you know nothing about traffic.

love,

Seattle

somewhere in the fog, you can see seattle.

grab a hot cup of hot chocolate and listen to this.

deborah turbeville

'I destroy the image after I've made it,' said Turbeville. 'Obliterate it a little so you never have it completely there.' Its a quite un-American world, a view through the rear window, facinated by the beaten, worn and forgotten..

//reposted from the blog fragments..

stormy daze.

completely intrigued by Sarah Moon

photographic evidence

//

today.

I saw this as I walked through Red Square at the University of Washington.

they had their boom box plugged in nearby with a big band blaring.

students shuffled passed on their way to class.

OBAMA is in TOWN

Today Obama is going to be in town for a rally for incumbent Senator, Patty Murray.. kind of a rough war in Washington state for the senate seat which is usually a given democrat. The tea party-ers where out in force on the overpasses as I drove to work. Unfortunately, I won't be able to join in and hearing the president because I have work.

Lately, I have been very envious of the French people. Not because of their baguettes or little French berets. Or their culture and language. No! in fact its because they know how to stick it to the man and tell him to suck! it! We are so terrified of our government, but France has a long tradition of revolution. so awesome. 1.2 million people took it to the streets in protest of the new pension plan that pushed retirement to 62. A lot of high schoolers participated too.. I can't imagine high schoolers here in the US even caring about their future pensions. I love you France for your murder of apathy. Virtual high five and double facebook like to you.

||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||>>||

In other news! I cut my locks! Finally.. and it feels good. I feel freed.. haha Scary though it might be, changes are usually good. Known evil seems attractive and comfortable but my new short and tangle-less hair seems a no evil at this point.

face & hair

drive

the drive today.
Seattle melted into the fog. Across the bridge I couldn't even see the city. It was if it had been abducted by the fog.
I took the back way through the arboretum. Its the longer way.. but the amazing forest that winds through the city is worth the drive once and a while.

KEXP provide the soundtrack..! glorious.

mornings in Seattle..

Jane Eyre

This morning was glorious! I couldn't help smiling when I saw Seattle sparkling against Lake Union on my drive into work. I am happy for now. Life is good. And trying to focus on the right things. Pulling the log out of my own eye, to be honest..

Today has promise. I am corny I know, but last night me and my mom watched BBC's Jane Eyre and what a contrast it is to Mulholland Drive and David Lynch's other film Blue Velvet, which I am currently watching.. Its not a masterpiece but it portrays something we all dream of yet mysteriously can't seem to always accomplish,.. love. It re-inspired me to wait for love. Not a perfect human being but one capable of this type of love that I so long for. Someone who also believes it is possible. Sometimes I think we make up the impediments to this sweet condition ourselves, or watch the pot, or look for it in all the wrong places. We seek the thrill and sell out before we find the real thing. Patience is a virtue that I must learn for it reaps the most amazing beautiful benefits. I know I am impatient but looking at Eyre who didn't really even believe that she need look for love or expect it in life, found it because by the same attitude she didn't contrive it. Focus on life, happiness, moderate ambition, spontaneity, enjoyment of small things and I am sure, if it is meant to be, it will come.

So re-infused with the promise of a hopeful outlook and the excitement of filmic pursuits and new opportunities .. new challenges.. new places that will destroy my comfort zone but make me awesomer.. I find a kind of contentment, that doesn't live on its own but MUST be fostered. I know that now. For me to be happy with who I am and life in general, I have to work at it. It doesn't come naturally but it is on me to do it. All on me. I know that now. God claims no part in that. He can open a door but I can just as easily slam it in His face with my attitude or not even see it or want it. That means God is a choice. I even choose to want Him to exist and I design the value of His worship. And I am searching to find the wisdom of the Bible reflected in the world.. I know I am bias because I want to find.. but I'll try and stay objective so that when I find those snatches of God, it will be real.



Haha I heard in a T.I. and Chris Brown song this morning that said "my road to redemption has no GPS".. I feel like that is true. In our youth we kinda wander.. and I think, more than anything, ourselves is what hurts us the most. I don't think T.I. means redemption from hell, and I don't think that is what interests me either. Its more redeption from yourself. From unhappiness. I think one day ((hopefully if we have learned from our mistakes)) we see life for what truly it is. Honestly what it is. And we know what we claim and value in it.. and we attach ourselves to those things and let others identify WHO WE ARE through it.

At the same time people can sound soooo wise when they haven't been there. Wisdom is good, but it should be taken in context.. and your grain of salt in anyone's wisdom is based off your lived life.. only you know what you NEED and what you want for yourself. so chase it! And then live it and don't look back. Questioning is good but a life over analyzed and over questioned is HELL. I say intuition is priceless. You'll know when you are headed the right way..

I talked with a friend the other night.. a friend who was really really really conservative for the longest time. Then she confronted reality.. tested her beliefs and is a whole new person. Yesterday's wisdom is not her wisdom of today. She has become world wise. I don't mean cynical. Don't ever let cynical-ness destroy the possibilities.. because life can be whatever you set your mind and your attitude for it to be.. but she had realized how life works for her .. her soul. That is pure good goodness when you find that!!!

Mulholland Drive

This last weekend I saw David Lynch's Mulholland Drive.
It was the most interesting film I have seen in a long time.
A lot people dismiss it because it is very indirect in its narrative style and the story appears scattered.However the acuity of the filmmaking skill involved with its creation speaks otherwise and I could helpbut to have an uncanny connection with the material.
Mulholland Drive is one of those films where you feel a very strong auteur at the reigns. I had much the similar feel as when I saw Kill BIll for the first time. It left me compelled by the depth of the characters and the genuinity of the moments on screen as well as the execution those scenes ... yet I was totally baffled by some of the meaning that seemed to be lurking.

I think I got it. A bad dream reconstructed to be good, to fool the main character, Betty, into believing that she didn't do what she had done, that the system was against her and that her actions were not real, until the horror of her true
intentions, actions, and false talent overwhelm her into taking her own life. Clues are strewn through the film to her
true downfall and that the main plot line of the film is her trying to hide that truth from from us and herself.

There is one very poignant scene of the film where Betty and her lover Rita go to the theater and see and act in which the truth
is also skewed.. in which great performances are faked.. lip synced and Betty realizes her fallacy as well. The metaphor works to make comments on so many things in David Lynch's POV, including his own film industry.

For some reason I am drawn to the honest mess this film seems to shed light on. It feels truly cinematic even if a bit artsy. Don't take my word for it. See the movie for yourself. But do be warned the concepts and portrayed characters are not for all and I definitely wouldn't recommend this movie for your general audience or party setting.

DAVID LYNCH. awesome!

And yes.. I know I am a little late on the draw seeing this movie.

haha

I love the Tune-Yards

//

please play these songs .:.

Synonynonym

Fiya

ShadowCatcher // Week 2

This is was another long and lonely week at the empty house.
Luckily, I decided to go to my grandparents this weekend to see both sets of them.
I've never really visited them alone before, as a representative of just me.. usually always
with the rest of the gang, but it was kinda cool to see them and hang out with them.
Family is very comfortable very safe and happy.

One thing I noticed that was very pronounced was the fact that I have been living in a bubble for a very long
time. I have enjoyed the kind of Christianity that I am comfortable with and spirituality that I have always
and consistently desired. We never did Bible studies, we never recited verses or did group prayers. Religion, or
spirituality, as I prefer, was more of a personal and internal connection and worship of God. Meeting "Christian"
guys as been a big let down.

Man, I really want to be compatible with you!
You probably would be good for me!

..but its not who I am. I kind of end up looking at it with degree of distaste. If you list "The Bible" as one of your
favorite books or God as one of the most important parts and passions of your life, I think that you are protesting
a little too much. Of course God is important to you if you are spiritual, of course! the Bible is hope and wisdom
for you! For me that is a given for who I am.. I want to know more realistically what you like and who you are.. not how
pious you supposedly are haha

Revelation: the two suck-iest things in life is putting people on pedestals and taking yourself too seriously.
I think both lead to unhappiness and unsatisfaction with yourself.

DUDE so yesterday there was the most amazing sunset at the homestead
mazing.
There are so many birds in the trees around my house.. their songs are defining in the night.
I don't know if they are migrating or not.. but they were dipping and plunging in and through the light of the sunset.
It was gloriously beautiful.






ShadowCatcher working has been good, although I've already decided that I have to go to LA or NYC to do what I want to do, so ShadowCatcher is not forever.

===>>>> my current and natural habitat

rediscovering the joy of hot coffee and mint milano cookies.. as well as euro macbook pros and final cut.. Native American photography and Mexican hand bags. >