um... new looks

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My messy room & I 🍃

A post shared by Anaelle 💚 (@anaellepostollec) on Jun 3, 2019 at 9:53am PDT

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orange juice

A post shared by ☆ 𝔢𝔪𝔞𝔩𝔢𝔢 ☆ (@boxlrr) on Feb 22, 2019 at 1:11pm PST

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🤠☕️🎞 I’m rocking like 5 different Kenna eras all in one rn.

A post shared by McKenna Kaelin | lvl 23 (@cozykitsune) on May 7, 2019 at 7:24pm PDT

E-girls and aesthetic gals are so interesting!
my newest make up obsession.

These girls are droopy, sad and popping with color. Whatever the case, there are a lot of really stylistic and colorful make up choices that are fun to play with including: using blush as eyeshadow, intense strikes of blush on the sides of the face and hitting the nose, aesthetic freckles sometimes even shapes, glitter and eyeshadows hitting the corners of the eyes.

Here are some of my most favorite new products I would love to try:

MILK

milk promises to be cruelty free and only the best ingredients  -- I have their KUSH mascara and it is a 10. Eyeing these eyeshadow liquids <3

LEMONHEAD LA

Glitters are Lemonhead LA's forte and boy are they beautiful 

NYC

Their eye products are great :) and very affordable -- you can find them at your local drugstore so I won't be labor this point!

SMITH AND CULT

Absolutely love my peach blush and its gets you those hits of bright color for all your angles. You should also check out their blush :)

SEPHORA -- or ULTA if you want more for your buck but less color options

The matte lipstick game at these of these two proprietary brands is on tap. Sephora has more colors but Ulta has more product in east tube for about the same size!

IGK 

Hair strobbing with glitter YES PLEASE -- this brand at Sephora has all the fun sprays for the hair that you might need to show off at the party.

STILA

My fav glitter eye accessory

Rememory - By Supa Bwe (feat. Chance the Rapper)

1 YEAR since India

This February is the one year anniversary of my first trip to India. To celebrate and to celebrate National Geographic's 100 million instagram followers, I submitted some photos to their contest #natgeo100contest


Enjoy those photos here below

National Geographic is celebrating its 💯 million followers with a photography contest. —— it’s also the one year anniversary of my first trip to India 🇮🇳 so I am submitting my photos of the fantastic people of India spotted on my trip. /// Nat Geo has always inspired the idea of sharing pockets of culture in intimate and momentary snatches via photography. That is what I’ve always loved about it most. 1. A girl’s school field trip to Red Fort / 2. Chandni Chowk outside Jama Masjid / 3. Chaat peddler roaming the highway toll lines / 4. A girl spotted me taking her photo at Karim’s in old Dehli / 5. Shop keepers at a small clothing shop in Delhi / 6. Waiting passengers at the Kolkata train station / 7. A little boy living in Tosh, Himachal Pradesh / 8. Bride @r.sreemoyee and groom @abhik1205 in Kolkata / 9. Local woman in Kolkata feeds her neighborhood street dog pack / 10. Women riding the train near Kolkata in the women only carriage (only noticed the « Men Not Allowed » sign till I got home!) / Thanks @natgeo @natgeotravel !!#natgeo100contest #travelphotography #india

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the launchpad

Trail Log #3: Heather Lake

Sunday we enjoyed a very snowy hike around Heather Lake but overall only small accumulation. Very pleased that we didn't need to use microspikes even though my brother wore a pair of hiking boots that were not waterproof.


The trailhead itself only had about 4 cars when we got there. Seemed reasonable given that it was raining off and on throughout the drive there.

An argument had broken out about what was the most efficient way to get there. I was surprised that google took us to highway 9 on to 92 which leads straight to the trail after a short dirty road turn off. The road was rough, not rocky and even but full of enormous potholes filled with water that were a little bit disconcerting even with our 4 wheel drive Honda CRV.


The trail follows a traverse with switchbacks that works you up steeply towards the basin which the lake is situated. Sometimes we wondered out loud if it was really just a creek posing as a trail as there were long swafts of the hike that a stream seemed to run straight down the trail space.


The trail abutted several extremely large old growth stumps which had been cut down during the first logging of the area, more than 100 years ago. You could even still see where the had cut notches to stand upon while sawing the trees down.

The trail is lovely with big and fascinating trees and brooks that make little cascades and pools. The trail come up at the highest point and then transverses downward to the lake. By this time we had walked up into the snow which had started a dusting on trees and slowly crept further and further along the base of the path until the trail and surroundings  were cover with a light dusting. The position of the lake was somewhat mysterious as the path meandered for a bit and you could see snatches of the peaks that loomed above it, their tops mostly obscured by a settling fog.

Before the end of the trail wrapped its way around each end of the lake, there actually was a sign for a restroom at the top. We chose the pathway leading to the left and took a stop to eat a snack and drink. The trail is a good work out! Though short, it is pretty steep and full of roots and rocks to navigate.

We walked the entirety of the lake around and it was beautiful to see the snow surrounding its glassy surface and the exposed boulder field sitting at the bottom of the peaks. Unfortunately, there was too much fog to see the tops, but the fog also set a mysterious mood. We had heard that there were avalanches in the area so we stayed to the path strictly.

As we marched back down the trail, it started to snow pretty heavily. We saw some hikers pass us on the trail wearing only blue jeans and thin sweaters. Would not recommend as you would get very wet and cold. Once we got back to the parking lot, we saw it was full! Can't imagine what it is like in the summer. AND it was super bowl Sunday.


All in all a lovely trip up to Heather Lake. :)

Trail Log #2: Granite Lakes - Middle Fork of the Snoqualmie

Our second hike of the season was an attempt to go somewhere I had never been before and push ourselves further. Somewhere I had never explored was the wilderness of the Middle Fork of the Snoqualmie River. The entrance to this area is up Highway 2. 

The parking lot was amazingly well groomed. It immediately didn't feel that wild. But quickly as we ascended on the trail it seemed like as wild of a place as any. 

The trail wound around the base of the mountains and we were completely enveloped in clouds. We were worried that the predicted sun would not show up, but as the elevation rose so did the cloud cover. Amongst that all was the most beautiful sun breaks that beamed through the trees.

The climb then became more intense. The grade at the beginning of the trail was fairly flat, being an old road. The grade on the final stretch was a long plod, constant grid to the fork between Johnson and Granite Lakes. We had originally wanted to continue out climb to the ridges above. But our time was short and our legs tired so we opted to check out the lake below. 

It was disappointing to have to head downward to the bowl between the mountains to reach the lake but once we got there, the lake felt as alpine as a lot of the high mountain lakes I have been to.

We found a place along the lake to have lunch and there were several other parties there enjoying the lake view. Sipping on whiskey and bok choy we were quite the eclectic group.  

The trail really peters out at the end. The lake is within site but we had a hard time getting to it. We had to bushwack a tiny bit to make it to the water edge.

At the end of the day, Middle Fork impressed me quite a bit. It felt like a wilderness area and I felt like I could lose myself and forget the hard work/school week. It also was a tough climb and really got us working hard for it. It was a great training hike for us kids that are still out of shape.

Trails Log #1: Serene Lake

Jan 20 - Lake Serene

Weekend before last brought a beautiful winter hike up to Serene Lake. Part of our beginning training circuit in the lower Cascade Mountains before the warmth of summer melts the bigger mountains. This year I want to climb some of the bigger scrambles in the high alpines, so we have to start training now.

Was happy that the traffic back up from Monroe was mostly because of Steven’s Pass skiers as the trailhead parking was pretty light. For winter, the trail is still very popular despite being a pretty long and steep (in parts) trail.

The trail passes by some pretty impressive falls at about the halfway point and would be a great lunch spot if it hadn’t been so cold.

As we got higher in the mountains, it was advantageous to have microspikes but not necessary. Most just some remnants of packed snow on the trail itself left from multiple people compacting its surface. The trail is fairly flat hiking up the edge of the hillside and then the middle portion of the trail inclines steeply with the aid of stairs that can be hard on the knees. The switchbacks take you up not completely to the top of the mountain but then curve around the side, traversing along till you see the lake.

Mt. Index is high enough above to collect snowy and rockies views that are pretty spectacular from the lake. Make sure to head all the way to Picnic Rock (even thought it is up a steep little hillside) as the view becomes unobstructed and there is a completely smooth rock that you can sit and gaze upon the mountain from.

Leave early if you can as Highway 2 has a lot of stoplights through small towns like Sultan and Gold Bar making traffic barely a crawl later in the day -- when people visiting eastern washington and skiing come back from the pass.

HIGHWAY 20 pro tips

Excellent breakfast spot that started our day: Sultan Bakery. It will now will be our go-to for Mt. Loop hikes. They sport a breakfast burrito for only $3 and coffee and pastries as far as the eye can see.

There is a Safeway in Monroe on the way out that does have supplies of snacks and protein bars. Yay!

On the way back, we stopped at my favorite drive-in Alpen Village in Sultan. Pretty good post hike meal!



Under the Sea

Looking at a Jacques Cousteau book at work today

self trust.

Number one thing I am working on currently is self trust.

It seems so weird that it has taken me this long. But really, anxiety can have a devastating effect on your intuition and can make you question the things you do all the time. You will intuitively know that you should make a particular decision for yourself but the fact you are anxious makes you re-examine and question it over and over and over.

Building self-trust, for me, it going to have to be a long process of suffering and holding my anxiety and then watching the world more carefully to see how much my anxiety in projecting on to it.

Trusting the beauty that is inside of me when I am facing things that scare me is the hardest thing. I tend to discredit the glowing person that I can be when I am happy.

When I am happy, life is good just where it stands and I can accept whatever there is as neither good nor bad. But when I am anxious, I have a hard time doing this for myself and people who don't understand anxiety don't really have compassion for that.

That is why self trust has been hard because I have denied myself self-compassion about where my struggles are. I see myself as the only one who is having a hard time and I don't see that people from all walks struggle with their own form of anxiety and have their own issues that hurt them everyday.

Self trust will put me in a better place. Getting into the present and out of my head will put me in a better place.

When you do things out of anxiety it can be hard not to feel shame. But what I definitely am learning is that you will stay stuck unless you put one foot in front of the other.

There is nothing I can do to change my past and the mistakes I have made or the shame that anxiety has made me feel.

All I can do is make my present vibrant and amazing. That is taking one step forward instead of allowing myself to become stuck.

embracing concepts.

These are the ideas I am trying to embrace to get through my anxiety.

Radical Acceptance.

stop labeling things and experiences as "good" or "bad". They just ARE.

Present Mindfulness.

find joy in this very moment. The past is done. 

Practice Gratitude.

focus your energy on what is amazing in your life versus what you don't have.

Trust the flow.

let the flow create solutions and your path. Stick with fear instead of running. Trust that the universe is good.

in the moment.

“When you are washing the dishes, washing the dishes must be the most important thing in your life. Just as when you are drinking tea, drinking tea must be the most important thing in your life. Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the whole world revolves—slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future. Live the actual moment. Only this actual moment is life.”

—	Thich Nhat Hanh

Combat baby.

The wonderfully natural way I combat my anxiety. Mint/chamomile tea with 4 full droppers of Valerian tincture added. It's AMAZING

way behind.

Listened to my friend, Aaron Roche's album. Its not new anymore. I am way behind.

Still makes me happy :)

Kaizen

I love this idea so much! Consistent, sustainable, concrete goals.

embrace the philosophy of small, continuous improvement

or 

Kaizen

"While Kaizen was originally developed to help businesses improve and thrive, it’s just as applicable to our personal lives, and it’s the antidote to perpetual, puke-inducing rides on the self-improvement roller coaster. Instead of trying to make radical changes in a short amount of time, just make small improvements every day that will gradually lead to the change you want. Each day, just focus on getting 1% better in whatever it is you’re trying to improve. That’s it. Just 1%. "

Read more here: Art of Manliness <<<

the perks of anxiety

I have thought A LOT about the downside to anxiety, but this morning I starting thinking about the good things.

Yes, the good things.

Anxiety does do several things that I am extremely grateful for.

First, it has made me extremely attentive to the world and to others' feelings. I am sensitive, yes, and probably because of my anxiety.. but I also am very sensitive to other people and to the beautiful things in the world. I can recognize and cherish them only because my extreme attentiveness allows me to notice those things. This, in moderation, and in balance with my own life has been an amazing blessing. I am working on that balance everyday.

Second, going along with sensitivity, having the handicap of being anxious has forced me to better myself all the time. I have had to take a hard look at things in my life and take action for myself. Take responsibility for myself. Anxiety didn't force that on me but without it I may not appreciate the progress and steps I have made along the way to be a better person and to feel better. When you know how hard it can be, you can have empathy for others and compassion for yourself.

Life can sometimes be about suffering but if anxiety is one of the worst things going on in my life, I count myself as very lucky. I have never found suffering to be just for its sake. Everything that has happened to me has shaped and molded me and, I think, only made me better.

Though I can agonize about whether or not my anxiety makes me more difficult or question my worth when it is at its peak, today I realized I am an amazing person because of my anxiety.

Embrace your faults, I say. They are mostly what makes you who you are. You can always self-improve and get better along with all the rest in the world but your faults are truly your own. Who you are is defined by how you approach your faults. How you handle them.

I love that thought :)

Recent Adventures .:.

Being human. Quotes

Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
- Miguel Angel Ruiz

Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.

- Ephesians‬ ‭4:2‬ ‭NLT‬‬ 

It’s okay to be sad when you mess up, but don’t dwell for too long. The mistake has already been made, and you can’t erase the fact that it happened. You can either learn from it or mope about it. The choice is yours, but remember, we are only human; we were born to make mistakes. Simply put, if you have never made a mistake in your life, then that means that you have never taken a risk. Taking risks means that you go outside of your comfort zone – that you go outside of your boundaries. The most successful people are the ones who are not afraid to give it their all and possibly humiliate themselves greatly in front of others. It’s like that one saying, ‘The person who asks a question is a fool for five minutes, but the person who never asks and remains silent is a fool forever.’ You choose the way you want to live your life.

- Cynthia Amy Tang 

Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t do.

- Rikki Rogers

I can get my head turned by a good-looking [someone] as much as the next [person]. But sexy doesn’t impress me. Smart impresses me, strength of character impresses me. But most of all, I am impressed by kindness. Kindness, I think, comes from learning hard lessons well, from falling and picking yourself up. It comes from surviving failure and loss. It implies an understanding of the human condition, forgives its many flaws and quirks. When I see that in someone, it fills me with admiration.

- Lisa Unger

"Whatever you resist you become. If you resist anger, you are always angry. If you resist sadness, you are always sad. If you resist suffering, you are always suffering. If you resist confusion,you are always confused. We think that we resist certain states because they are there, but actually they are there because we resist them." 
— Adyashanti

The fact that you’re struggling doesn’t make you a burden. It doesn’t make you unloveable or undesirable or undeserving of care. It doesn’t make you too much or too sensitive or too needy. It makes you human. Everyone struggles. Everyone has a difficult time coping, and at times, we all fall apart. During these times, we aren’t always easy to be around — and that’s okay. No one is easy to be around one hundred percent of the time. Yes, you may sometimes be unpleasant or difficult. And yes, you may sometimes do or say things that make the people around you feel helpless or sad. But those things aren’t all of who you are and they certainly don’t discount your worth as a human being. The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved. You can be difficult and still be cared for. You can be less than perfect, and still be deserving of compassion and kindness.

- Daniell Koepke

the tiny house movement.

This idea is calling my name. I would love to live in a tiny house. Simplicity and economy. Ultimate for my minimalist goals :)

Check more out at:
http://tinyhousesgalore.com/

Focused on myself.

I think I finally am getting the hang of focusing on myself.

Everyone has goals and mine have always been tangible. I could show someone what I had accomplished. This made it feel praise worthy.

But recently my goals have been decidedly inward. More about doing internal work. This is really for myself because it truly is for no one but me. No one will see the impact, there won't be any praise. I am hoping that I will just feel better and be stronger.

Mostly, I am trying to attend to my emotional needs. Stand up and say what I need and have my own back in those situations so that I can be strong. Also communication, communication, communication. I have been communicating as much as I can and as often as I can and I have not regretted it. I will learn how to move through conflict and I will learn how to lower the stakes and realize the more upfront I am at the beginning the more I will get what I need. And also not hurt others in the process.

Anxiety has been plaguing me too and I have upped my medication and promised myself that I will stick to it. I will take my meds everyday because I know that is taking care of myself. I also am considering talking to a psychiatrist to tweak my meds and to see if there is anyway of pinpointing my anxiety disorder and figuring out how to treat it better.

Friendships are becoming so important. I have been trying to skate by on the shallow because its hard to be open and honest with yourself and in that process be authentic and make strong and durable connections with others. But true and deepening friendship are helping me do this and have the courage to do this. They are teaching me that communicating with someone who cares about you will never hurt. That people do not abandon you when you need them. And there are people who look deeper and see value in the things you have cultivated that aren't on the surface.

On the outside, I am losing weight and working on my acne. I know that both of these issues have been there because of the stress I have put on myself to be perfect. The more I let go and not stress eat and get motivated enough to exercise, the more that the weight falls off naturally. I have gone from 167 lbs to 142 lbs and counting. My goal weight is 135 but maybe I can make it to 130. The acne I have been battling for so long is finally starting to fade. I have found a skin care regime that seems to be tough enough to do that job but also gentle enough for my skin. Winning!!

Lastly, I am trying to make my world more... mine. I have started to slow down and be home more. Clean more. Organize more. Pay attention to the little details of my life and not distract myself all day and let the little things that improve my mood fall through the cracks. That means more tea and more reading of books and tending to my little garden and generally hanging out with myself.

I have every faith that things will fall together :) But eureka! I am going to take care of myself well in the meantime!